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The Best Sex Toys for Your Zodiac Sign

Pleasure inside.

best sex toys for zodiac sign
Alec Kugler

Vibrators! Cock rings! Handcuffs! Clone-a-willy! Pick your pleasure, friends. If you know where to start, that is. Choosing the right accessory to enhance your solo play or make your partner action extra fuego requires some trial, er, error (someone had to do it), and guidance. To your delight, astrologer and healer Kelsey Korero deciphered celestial patterns to find out what fun, wiggling sex toy is a perfect match for your zodiac sign. We mean it when we say enjoy!



March 21 - April 19

“Rambunctious Rams are the wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am of the zodiac. These athletic, Mars-ruled babes like to be the leader and the lover who calls the shots. That take-me-now vibe doesn’t have to end in a 30-second blaze of glory; invest in a vibrating cock ring for extra stamina and stimulation, and turn the bedroom sprint into a marathon.”



April 20 - May 20

“Sumptuous and strong, Bulls are super-sensuous and need to get it on in style. Ruled by the fertility goddess Venus, Taureans desire earthly pleasure and comfort above all. Go for something simple with a scrummy edible massage oil, or invest in a sturdy sex-position wedge for extra bodily support.”



May 21 - June 20

“Witty and wonderful, a Gemini can talk anyone into the sack. These air signs adore role-playing and little surprises. Take a break from talking dirty, and try a ball gag, leaving it up to your partner to tell you what to do next. Try one with an attachable dildo to double the fun for the cosmic twin.”



June 21 - July 22

“The cuddly cosmic Crab is ruled by the moon and, like the ocean tides, can take their lover to unimaginable depths of pleasure. That is, provided they have one thing: trust. Explore the bonds of intimacy with bondage ropes, silky restraints, and comfortable cuffs. For extra reassurance, take a beginners’ bondage class together in your city one Saturday afternoon, and learn to properly truss your lover. Caring Cancers will adore the security of submission play done right.”



July 23 - August 22

“Lusty Leos are ruled by the sun and love to know that they’re unforgettable. Treat yourself or your Leo lover to the ultimate ego-boost: Invest in a Clone-a-Willy or Clone-a-Pussy kit. Use the special molding kit to create a bespoke silicone replica of your favorite naughty bits (or your own). Leos aren’t just adorably vain, but super loyal too, and will love the idea of a sex toy made in their honor. A perfect backup when your partner has had one too many on a Saturday night and isn’t up to your frisky demandsor a gorgeous portable gift to remind your partner what they’re missing when they’re away on business trips.”



August 23 - September 22

“Divine Virgos aren’t actually ruled by a staid virgin, but the harvest goddesses who pulled abundant goodness from the earth. Our efficient Virgo queens love natural goods, dedication, and are serious perfectionists: Invest in a set of Ben Wa balls for toning Kegels as part of the morning routine. Or step it up with a jade yoni egg or rose-quartz crystal dildo. Purity, spiritual elevation, and orgasms on demand = one Virgo with no complaints.”



September 23 - October 22

“Librans are the do-gooders of the zodiac, represented by the balanced scales and totally adept at maintaining positive relationships with everyone from their colleagues to airport security staff. These air signs are discreet, chic, and totally polite, so a perfect addition to any Fendi baguette is a compact lipstick vibrator. Small, glossy, and easily disguised as a makeup extra, Libra babes will love being able to get off on the go without being late to their next social gathering.”



October 23 - November 21

“Power is everything to these deep, sultry water signs, and sex is their power game of choice. Scorpio seduction is all about getting the other person to expose their deepest, darkest desires and share all of their secrets. Simple fluffy handcuffs are way too easy for these complex Pluto-ruled babes. Take it up a notch with a bondage spreader bar and ankle cuffs, and see what happens when there’s nowhere to hide.”



November 22 - December 21

“These fire signs are the most active and free-spirited of the Zodiac. Their amazing bods and spontaneous nature make for amazing, adventurous sex wherever they feel the need. A sex swing is a necessary purchase for all Saggi lovers. Go one better, and buy an over-the-door portable option. No longer limited to supine straddling from an attic beam, toss it in your bag for a post-workout changing room session with your S.O. or a hotel room surprise. Sagittarians are ruled by lucky planet Jupiter, so you might just get away with a semi-public romp.”



December 22 - January 19

“Capricorns are famed for their business acumen, ambition, and boss mentality. Ruled by Saturn, these surprisingly sexy earth signs are all about the well-earned rewards, even in bed. Take advantage of the Capricorn ability to manage and desire to succeed: Pick up a remote-controlled mini vibrator set for you and your partner. Take control of their orgasms with one click of a button, or upgrade to a device that comes with an app. You’ll love being able to flick their switches without even needing to step out of that all-important board meeting.”



January 20 - February 18

“Quirky Aquarians may be represented by the water bearer, but they’re actually an air sign. Surprise, right? Aquas thrive on anything unexpected, innovative, or futuristic: If you want a sex machine, you got it! Literally. Try out an oral-sex simulator or strap-on with interchangeable attachments. Perfect for their tendency to stay ‘in their head’ in intimate moments, Aquarians will love fiddling and adjusting their newfangled device’s settings to get you both off.”



February 19 - March 20

“Magical Pisces are ruled by water-planet Neptune and can be the lover of your dreams—if you can catch them at all! Slippery sex in the shower or tub are divine times with Pisces, so invest in strong suction-capped handles and foot rests designed for you to reach all the right angles with no injuries. Pisceans also love pushing boundaries in the bedroom, so come equipped with an all-natural, expensive lubricant ready for those experimental sessions.”


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