The back patio at Austrian bio-hotel Stanglwirt was an AI image generator’s response to, “Midcentury Palm Springs swimming pool meets rural, post-war Europe shot by Slim Aarons with a touch of Smurfs’ village." I stood in the grass facing the adults-only pool, backdropped by the Wilder Kaiser mountain range. Just beyond my reach, sheep and horses grazed contentedly in a sun-soaked field. My eye caught the hotel’s cheesemaker crossing the street in head-to-toe white scrubs and white rubber boots–part nurse, part chef, part farmer–headed for the wrought iron gate at the cool, dark mouth of an ancient cave to check on her Stangl Alpine loaves.
I spent three nights at this 400-year-old, 160-acre organic farm and five-star wellness resort in Going am Wilden Kaiser in November. Jessica Alba had just visited too, and before her, Gwyneth Paltrow , Bing Crosby, Hilary Clinton, and Jane Goodall. At one point, I strolled a long corridor of photos of famous guests whose footsteps I had followed.
Celebrities flock to the idyll for its special breed of pastoral paradise, unparalleled luxury, and gorgeous guests. But families worldwide have been coming for years—80% are returning guests. Maria Hauser, Marketing Director and 11th-generation member of the family business, mentioned that the first female at the Frankfurt Stock Exchange was so taken with the place that she stayed for seven years straight. After marrying into the Siemens family, she stopped working but became poor when her husband lost his stake in the family fortune due to suspected gambling. Maria offered her an open room where the children's farm manager usually slept, but she eventually moved in with her sister in Berlin.
Stanglwirt’s legacy is also steeped in romance: Maria met her current boyfriend, a philanthropist and entrepreneur, through Arnold Schwarzenegger at his climate summit. She told me she has watched many couples meet there and get engaged; many returned years later with children.
To experience the luxury, charm, and lore of Stanglwirt firsthand, I decided to visit the place myself.
Courtesy of Stanglwirt
Betting on the Farm: On my first day at Stanglwirt, I sipped a cappuccino while ghost-white Lipizzaner horses trotted a few feet away, like an image in a Gondry film. I sat in the hotel’s two-story, pine-clad "Auf der Tenne" bar, where behind a massive glass wall was the hotel’s equestrian riding arena.
In fact, across the 52 hectares of pasture on which Stanglwirt resort lies, I was constantly reminded of its connection to its animals. I met multiple horses and cows and addressed them by first name. I even passed by the dedicated children’s farm, with its daily menu of fully supervised activities. I saw parents sneaking in guilt-free alone time as a result of this offering, knowing their little ones might spend their day feeding the sheep, leaping from a barn loft into a hay bed, or making their own piggy banks.
The connection came full circle at the elaborately stocked morning buffet, where I saw dairy products galore—milk, curd cheese, butter, yogurt, and hard cheese—likely all made under the same roof, helped along by my new non-human friends.
Courtesy of Stacy Suaya
Schnitzel, But Make It Spa: Johannes Hauser, Maria’s brother and Stanglwirt’s food and beverage director, told me, “Our inspiration is to be health-beneficial. But also, we are in the Alps and want to have people eat the schnitzel, so we are going to have both.” I watched a variety of Austrian and international dishes pass by my cozy corner perch in the Gasthof restaurant, from Kaiserschmarrn with plum roaster to a honey tomato avocado salad.
Johannes’ ethical practices once extended to nixing Nestle and Coca-Cola. However, due to a guest backlash, he started carrying them again. His footprint remains in the mini-bars, where I discovered Czech-owned Kofola (with 30% less sugar and no phosphorus). Even the welcome tray in my room was artful and ecological, yet did not take itself too seriously. It featured mason jars filled with fresh berries, pickled vegetables, and macarons.
Courtesy of Stacy Suaya
Courtesy of Stacy Suaya
Sustainable Before the Buzzword: I wasn’t surprised to hear that Gwyneth Paltrow has visited Stanglwirt; it was Goop-friendly before she was born. As I walked Stanglwirt’s long, sun-filled corridors, I breathed in the hotel’s chief construction material, antibacterial local Arolla pine—said to improve both sleep and heart rate variability—and learned later that the hotel employs a full-time craftsman who is wholly in charge of maintaining the wood.
Most impressively, the hotel runs on 100% CO2-free green electricity from small Tyrolean hydropower plants. Johannes told me he’s working with an Austrian energy company to be carbon-negative.
“With the trend towards sustainability,” Maria Hauser told me, “We are very thankful because finally people understand us and what we have been doing and saying forever, and nobody listened. [Before,] they were like, who are these Austrian hippies?”
She added that Stanglwirt also has thermal water, which is why they have the largest heated saltwater pool of any hotel in Europe. “The salt comes from nearby from in Bavaria—it's a half an hour away,” she said in a Gwyneth-esque way, and I made a plan to visit the spa.
Wellness at an Institution Level: Robed and ready for my Stanglwirt signature back massage, I stood in the 130,000-square-foot zero-emissions spa, staring at its live moss wall. My massage therapist, Erika Varro, arrived and said, “I do not speak English, but my hands speak perfect English.” I laughed, and within minutes, she was separating my shoulder blades from my spine. Pop pop pop, they went in satisfying cracks. I left feeling like rolled-out dough.
I carefully peeled my newly de-pretzeled body off the massage bed and took it to the hot brine pool with Bavarian salt. Afterward, I enjoyed a nude Aufgass sauna ritual where Brigitte Nielson’s doppelgänger steamed us like dumplings. In the spa complex’s ice-cold caves, she returned to slather me and about ten strangers in shea butter (a technique that dates back to Cleopatra).
The next morning, I walked past the dedicated Arnold Schwarzeneggar gym—the actual Terminator designed it and uses it—on my way to a training session with Bjorn Schulz, known for training the heavyweight boxing champions, the Kiltscho twins. I jabbed, crossed, and uppercut my way to a blissful cardio high I hoped would allow me to try more of Stanglwirt’s delectable bill of fare.
Courtesy of Stanglwirt
Beds With Benefits: During my travel writing career, I have come across many hotels that boast about their high thread counts or pillow menus. However, Stanglwirt took it to the next level by ensuring that all their beds are away from electromagnetic fields. (Apparently, beds on these fields act as radiation antennae—who knew?)
I stayed in the Sunroom Suite on a mattress filled with horsehair and sheep's wool ("the green bed" of Willi Dungl, the fitness guru who trained Formula One racer Niki Lauda) and had my own little jewel box of a sauna inside the bathroom. Resting my blonde head on the bed amidst the golden Arolla Pine walls, floor, and ceiling, I completed a misnamed Dylan album: Blonde on Blonde on Blonde on Blonde.
Keeping Tradition Alive: Riding the elevator to my room, I noticed a built-in cabinet. “What’s in there?” I asked my bellhop, who opened the latch and revealed a bottle of Schnapps with two shot glasses. He encouraged me to partake; it was a tradition. Another memorable detail at the hotel was the pair of dirndl-wearing women who knocked on my door at sunset with baskets of chocolates.
Maria Hauser considers trends as valuable as the hotel’s traditions. She said, “We are kind of not a real hotel. We grew up here on-site, so it's our home. And people feel at home maybe because it is a home, and now our kids are running around here and playing with the hotel guests.
“The other day, my 10-year-old daughter came with a girl she met at the children's farm,” she told me. “I looked at the girl, and I thought, this looks like my friend [from a long time ago]. Then her mother came around the corner, and I asked, " Laura, is it you from Switzerland? She said, ‘Yes, we are back, but I didn't want to bother you, so I booked under my new married name. But our daughters found each other at the children's farm.” Maria paused and looked wistful. I sensed her mind traveling back in time.
“And it was the same when we were little,” she concluded, then broke into a smile. “It's so cute when you see it continue.”