From the moment Miranda Hobbes enters the screen in the pilot of "Sex and the City" circa 1998, in a pristine power suit and pale blue pinstriped button up (while filling a plastic container during her lunch break from her corporate law job), you can tell that she is extremely cynical. Cynical in a completely justified way: the desirable bachelors in New York City were (and still are, sorry) few and far between and, for all of her friends, this was becoming increasingly frustrating. Miranda was the most transparent about how she felt about this, though. And she expressed herself with the most cuttingly dry one liners that I can only aspire to land. Up until recently, I always rejected being a Miranda in the same way that I always rejected being a Capricorn. Because Miranda is so obviously a Capricorn. I can chalk this up to not wanting to be the "boring" or "serious" character.
It's always been clear that Miranda was designed as a contrast to her more "feminine" group of friends: she had a pixie cut, was a smart woman in a male dominated industry, was opinionated and outspoken, and was blatantly honest, for better and for worse—all things that women weren't supposed to be back then and, depending on who you ask, still aren't supposed to be now. It's not surprising then, that the viewer sees her as the least desirable choice. What's important to note, though, is that despite this, she was admirably secure in herself. She wasn't spending hours on end dissecting every word that came out of a man's mouth or contemplating his interest in her because she felt secure in knowing that she was smart, successful, and interesting.
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At the group's first of many dating life debriefs around a table in the pilot episode, it's Miranda's birthday and she, Charlotte, Carrie, and Samantha, are discussing the relationship between sex and power. Miranda tells an anecdote about a poet that she dated purely for the sex and had no choice but to dump when he started wanting to read her his poetry in lieu of aftercare and take her out for dinner. One anecdote with her perfectly monotonous tone summed up her character's mindset in a single episode: she was jaded about love, a little emotionally detached, and not afraid to admit either of those things. Her mindset was undoubtedly justifiable: she was firm in what she wanted and unafraid to stand in the power of her sexuality, despite her approach not being considered traditionally "feminine". She was a progressive character at the time of air, representing all of the things that women weren't allowed to be on their own: smart, powerful, wealthy, horny, non-committal, brutally honest, funny, and more than willing to hurt a man's feelings and check their egos.
On her date with Skipper in the pilot episode, she challenges every word that escapes his mouth, puts her intelligence on display with back-to-back quips, and keeps him on his toes just to see if he is able to keep up with her. This was a preview of how she would interact with men throughout all six seasons. She knew that she, and all smart, interesting, beautiful women, deserve someone who is able to keep up with them. And still, to this day, many of us don't. Miranda was always put in positions that had her questioning her beauty. She never once questioned the fact that she was interesting.
Throughout the series and throughout many dating life debriefs at the diner, we would hear Charlotte preach her more traditional values, Samantha rave about her latest rendezvous, and Carrie express confusion about any and every man that she dates. Miranda, on the other hand, didn't often seek advice or validation from her friends. And this isn't because she wasn't dating or having sex. For Miranda, there wasn't anything that needed to be unpacked because she knew where she stood.
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She struck a work life balance that we should all aspire for: she kept up with the demanding schedule that comes along with being a lawyer while also always being down for a night out with the girls, wine and Chinese takeout at Carrie's apartment, or martinis and a little night of gay porn at Samantha's industrial Meatpacking District loft. Her style was continuously on point and diverse: corporate chic in power suits, and pressed button up shirts (with the occasional tie thrown into the mix), cool and casual in overalls, track pants, and mesh tanks, and perfectly layered pieces.
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In season 4, episode 4 (at which point her pixie cut had grown out into a little bob), in a moment where self control went completely out the window, Miranda eats a piece of cake out of the trash. What's most relatable of all is that she immediately clocks her own compulsory act. She has shame, she has self-awareness, and she has the ability to make fun of herself (in the most dry and sarcastic manner possible) on a voice message left for Carrie immediately after her trash cake moment. She represented all of us in our most weird, vulnerable, impulsive moments and gave us permission to laugh at the worst versions of ourselves.
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Even the most jaded, cynical, and guarded of girls can be cracked though. Despite being resistant, Steve came along and persisted and, ultimately, got through to Miranda. Even while in a relationship, she didn't lose any of the traits or quirks or characteristics that originally made her the most relatable. The most relatable thing about Miranda of all is that in a world where men were so concerned with "beauty" and less considered with personality, she was right to be so skeptical. She was confident enough to say the things that a lot of women have felt out loud. She was honest in a way that we should all aspire to be because there is power in not staying silent and comfort in release. Even though she ended up with a "nice guy", she would constantly make fun of herself for being in a relationship that she would have previously made fun of. And, despite changing, growing, and evolving, she always gifted us with a cuttingly dry cynical moment. This is to say that she was, until the very end, quintessential Miranda.
