sexy valentines day gift guide
Love And Sex

The Sexiest Valentine’s Day Gift Guide Ever

This list is full of “stocking stuffers,” if you will...

Remember back in the day when celebrating Valentine’s Day involved passing out heart-shaped cards and had nothing to do with fucking or spending money? Lord, that was a wholesome time. These days, for better or worse, Valentine’s Day tends to be celebrated a little bit differently. You know the drill: Come February 14th flowers will be bought, chocolates will be gifted, and dinner reservations will be fought over like rations during a war. Usually, some sex gets sprinkled into the mix, too. It’s tradition!

While many people begrudge the commercialization of Valentine’s Day, I am personally very much into it. Why? Because while you can’t buy love, you CAN buy presents! (As a single person who has dated some incredibly questionable creatures, I find this fact comforting.) Whether you are shopping for yourself or someone you love almost as much, here are some options guaranteed to make a lady feel special.

*Friendly reminder: This list includes vibrators, which make excellent gifts for yourself and your partner. They do not make excellent gifts for people you’re not involved in a consensual, sexual relationship with.


5 / 6
Satisfyer PRO Deluxe: I have a confession to make: I initially picked up this vibrator purely because it’s rose gold and I’m basic like that. While the Satisfyer’s design is what reeled me in, it was the vibrator’s Olympian-like performance that won me over. Instead of vibrating like most traditional devices, the Satisfyer Pro Deluxe features suction-style technology that simulates oral sex. And let me just say, it does the job fabulously. Waves and waves of orgasms on demand make this vibrator a (rose) gold medal winner for my personal version of the Winter Games. (Yes, I have a team… Let’s just say the bottom drawer of my bedside table is an Olympic Village.) It also wins bonus points for matching my fancy candles and a good chunk of my ring collection.
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