Living Off Ramen

The Most Over-The-Top Sneakers We’ve Ever Seen

Obviously we want them.

By: Laurel Pantin
Photography: Jake Rosenberg

I know these sneakers are kinda silly. They say things like “I love pizza pasta and music,” and “So fab!” on them, and yet, it’s the exact right kind of Italian maximalism that I totally get behind. Sono magnicifico, you could say (or maybe you couldn’t, I took Italian over ten years ago). Not only are they covered in glittery musical notes, and Sharpie-style scribbles—they also have studs. And pearls! They are most appropriately described as, coo coo bananas, and should only be worn with a cleavage-y printy floaty Dolce dress (and a crown!) and they’re perfect. They’re also unbelievably expensive, which makes me want them that more more. In order to afford these sneakers, I’d have to give up my cell phone plan for about seven months—meaning I wouldn’t even be able to show them off on Instagram. And if you can’t put them on the ‘gram, do you even really own them?

 

7 Months Of Cell Phone Service At $175 per month = 1 Pair Of Dolce & Gabbana sneakers At $1,195

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