How to Get Out of Bed in 60 Seconds
Morning people: If you’re out there and actually exist, you might want to sit this one out.
It’s the sentiment that birthed a thousand “the struggle is real” memes: getting out of bed. More specifically, getting out of bed on time for work, school, or any other real-world adult responsibility that doesn’t involve some approximation of brunch and day drinking. If you’re anything like the rest of us, your morning doesn’t start with a few minutes of graceful mediation or kicked off by an ass-kicking Pilates class: It’s all about hitting snooze a half-dozen times, and scrambling for your toothbrush and hair dryer while trying not to choke on your multi-grain toast and iced coffee. In the interest of pursuing that whole starting-the-day-on-the-right-foot maxim, here are a handful of ways to actually get out of bed—as in, on the first try—in 60 seconds.
Leave a glass by your nightstand and chug the moment you open your eyes. Not only is it refreshing, but it’s a great way to wake up that metabolism and rehydrate your body. Just think about it—you’ll have one of your eight glasses of drinking water done before you even brush your teeth.
Strategic Alarm Clock Placement
Maybe it’s just the ease of it all. You know, just one simple blind (because let’s be real, your eyes aren’t open) tap and you have an extra 10 mins of z’s. And since you’re probably pressing it more than once any given morning, the only way to get up right away is to move it far to the other side of the room. The only way to silence the noise? Actually getting UP.
Open Your Blinds
Our bodies have a knack for waking up with the sunrise. Since we draw our blackout-blind shut at night, seeing the sun in the AM just doesn’t happen. That’s why something like JBL’s Ambient Light Alarm is a game-changer. Once you set your wake-up time, a gradual light mimics the sunrise so you’re not jolted upright at the sound of your iPhone alarm. (Side note: Don’t you hate when people make this their text message notification? Just. No.)
You’d be hard-pressed to find anyone who doesn’t agree: The deafening sound of a morning alarm is just the WORST. Imagine if you’d never have to hear it again. Ever. And wouldn’t you know it, we found something: Withing’s Activité. This slim leather strap watch is actually a tech toy. We know, it doesn’t look the part, and for that, we couldn’t be more into it. It tracks your sleep patterns and gently vibrates to wake you up on mute and so, so much more.
Lay Off the Caffeine & Alcohol
So sometimes, a late-night glass of Merlot or a foamy cappuccino are a post-long-workday necessity. We get it. But if an early morning is on your Google Cal, you’d probably be better off skipping the night cap and swapping for a warm cup of herbal tea. Get a good night’s sleep and a super early morning won’t be so painful, we promise.
Set Your Keurig
Okay, so we may have told you no coffee before bed, but we’re looking out for you! Set your coffee machine to time with your alarm clock, so it’s ready the moment your eyes open. The smell alone should lure you out of bed, even if you’re curled up in 600-thread-count Egyptian cotton sheets.
Change Your Tune
No, we’re not being bankrolled by The Secret: Stop telling yourself you’re not a break-of-dawn person, because it will actually make you into a non-morning person. Follow the mantra of a morning person and tell yourself you love waking up early. You’d be surprised how it actually works.
What the eff is melatonin? It’s a hormone that your body naturally churns out to stimulate sleep. Talk to your doc before deciding on a supplement dosage and to make sure it’s right for you. But if your doctor gives you the green light, in just a few days your body clock should be reset and waking up early should be no problem.
Turn Off Netflix
Sorry, guys. We get the whole Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt marathon thing, but it’s probably the reason you’re pressing snooze 10 times before actually sitting up in bed. Power down your laptop and use every ounce of willpower to avoid checking your phone; it’ll make going to sleep easier and waking up on the first alarm actually bearable.